Tag: life

Mom’s The Word…

I have always prided myself on being a good mother. And by good mother I mean patient, kind, interested, nurturing, strong, forgiving and so on and so on. I may not always be firing on all cylinders at all times, but I hold up my end of the bargain pretty well. And then there was Carter…My surprise baby. #4!  The one I never saw coming and who could not have shown up at a more complicated time in my life.  We thought we were done having babies. Having had three boys, I had settled into the fact that I wouldn’t ever have the good fortune of having a daughter. I embraced that I have two God daughters and looked forward to granddaughters, and daughter in-laws etc.

We found out that we were have a Baby Girl and as if the shock of the pregnancy wasn’t enough, it was no easy ride either putting me in the hospital for a month and delivering weeks early. But… that is a post for another day. We made it through and I tried and still try hard to keep my head above water. I have felt defeated by life before, but I never felt more defeated as a Mom until we had number 4. I shared the post below with a Mom’s group that I belong to and I found the response to be overwhelming and supportive.

I also found that Social Media is really good at showing us the highlight reel of peoples lives. And why wouldn’t it be? No one wants their failures to play out publicly. So we only upload pictures and tell the stories that portray beauty and glee. I know there is a place for that too. But there is also a great place for truth and vulnerability. I promise to give that to you here. We don’t need anymore models to look at and wish we could be that pretty, or that skinny any more than we need pretend model families portraying only the perfect house with the white picket fence, the 2.5 kids and the family dog.

I love those photos too, but it is my job as the spectator to not get sucked into imagery so much that I discount my own life. Its my job to take that fake family’s photo out of the new picture frame I just bought, and replace it with memories of my own. That is your job too. So I found by sharing my frustrations and weaknesses I opened the door to greater connections with people who just needed me to say it first. I hope that more people will share the famous moments that has helped to make the thread of their families so strong, not because it has never been dirtied, but because it has managed to stay in tact even after several washes.

Capture

Viewer Discretion is Advised…

At the risk of offending some,  I am going to address what is going on in the world between the police and African-American men. I was very hesitant to do so because honestly, there is enough bad news going around on the television and social media, who needs my two cents? But the weight of this issue has tripled and so I want to dedicate a post to all those who have fallen.

I am not a conspiracy theorist, in the least! In fact…those people actually annoy me. I remember growing up listening to my Dad conjure up his Pelican Briefs. Pelican Briefs being what I called every conspiracy that he spoke out loud. If the phone clicked in his ear while he was in the midst of a conversation… that meant the FBI had been listening in. If the Lakers got too many bad calls on them in a row… then the refs were working with the other team. And if a plane went down for any reason at all…Well… that was the CIA of course. I used to laugh and shake my head at him for believing that everything was so calculated. Things have gotten a lot less funny as I have gotten older.

When my father dedicated his life to Christ, there were still conspiracies, but now the enemy was the devil. “The devil don’t sleep!” he’d say “So you better say your prayers.” I think back on that fondly now, and if he was still here today prayers would be plentiful and he would have a whole brief about the way things have been going down for decades, but most blatantly since Trayvon Martin was slain. 

Since then there appears to be a wave of bodacious violent behavior against Black men. George Zimmerman, claimed to be a concerned citizen, which in my opinion was a very sheer cover up to the evil heart behind his actions. But these officers of the law, who are sworn to protect and serve, are supposed to know better. Who are you protecting and serving by executing a man for a fix-it ticket violation? Who are you protecting or serving by choking a man out on the street who is in distress and telling you that he can not breathe? And who do we protect and serve by shooting down an unarmed boy who stole a pack of cigarillos?  How is society made better by sending the message to a culture of people that their lives have no value? To me this does not seem like an  epidemic…its a pandemic. Its not episodic…and it is being further perpetuated by failure of consequences and the message is LOUD. If we treat them like animals, we can provoke them to respond like one.

These are not coincidences. These feel like plotted attacks against a people…my people. And while I stay away from the TV and the news feeds my heart is very heavy. My heart is heavy for the mothers, wives, sisters and brothers, children and loved ones of these victims. My heart is heavy for a generation of young black children and adolescents who can be here today and gone tomorrow because of the color of their skin and a black hoodie. My heart is heavy and my breathing labored as I raise not one, not two, but THREE sons in a time where there is a debate between #BlackLivesMatter and #AllLivesMatter…how about LIFE matters…Because it does, no matter the color, but one color is currently under attack.

To handicap a people in society by killing their men publicly and ferociously and then giving their murderers administrative leave to investigate when there is VIDEO and AUDIO footage is also so very LOUD. It not only compromises the lives of civilians, but also the faithful and just law enforcers who share a badge, but not a prejudice. The tension this evokes is terminal and intentional in my opinion. I see these cops who are taking these charges as I see the suicide bombers of terrorism groups. This is a movement and it can not be ignored. The alarm needs to be rang, the security rating needs to move to RED, and killing needs to end. I am praying for my people, I am praying for people who truly protect and serve EVERYONE, I am praying for my SONS, and I am praying for this nation. Thanks for reading.